Greentext

Have to make permanent choices early on. Get poor, half-assed introduction into lore that is way overcomplicated.

Just like real life.

There's a skip button in every cinematic but it does nothing.

Choices once made (purchasing armor) cannot be undone later. Buy a half-assed weapon in round 1, fill that slot forever and never be able to throw it away later.

Mind you, Monster Hunter World forces every player of a hunting squad to view an unskippable story mission cutscene in their own hosted instance before being able to join another player's session of the same mission.

Lots of watching the cutscene in a solo hunt, abandoning the mission, then joining on a friend.

Game is not open-source.

Does not run fluently on a modern computer in 2024.

Requires internet connectivity even though single-player.

Enemies get way harder as you progress through the game and upgrade your weapons, making all these upgrades essentially useless.

Earned levels increase your character's size permanently. As your character grows, it can no longer sneak into small tunnels to catch precious loot.

You have to spend your earned money after every round. You cannot save it to learn what skills you actually need and then bulk-buy later.

When you die you have to re-start from the beginning. From the very beginning.

Please stop trying to normalize the stupid QAnon frog.

Binary morality system where you can only choose between being a normal person or a mass murdering psychopath. Then your decision has no consequences.

Although it has a PC version nothing can be configured.

Menus use a virtual mouse cursor even though you're playing with a controller.

Every single shelf, cupboard, sack, discolored patch of dirt, hollow tree, etc. Is lootable. 99.9% of the loot is useless. The remaining 0.1% is key to solving several quests and/or the best stuff in the game.

Gameplay heavily based on dodging and careful movement, but you can only dodge by double tapping movement keys or the stick

Pointless inventory management and crafting.

Everything has durability

• DLCs out-the-ass Paradox-style.
• Escort quests/missions where the NPCs move at a speed between the player's walk speed and run speed.

Why are they starting with "starting the game"?

They forgot to start with a kernel-level anticheat and a pointless, slow to load "need an account, always online" launcher.

Equipment can be upgraded, but only through an enormous amount of tedious grind for tiny incremental improvements.

By halfway through the upgrade tree, all the equipment is overpowered and will make any boss fight trivial, including the final boss of the game. All additional upgrades are meaningless.

You don't get to see the real ending unless you fully upgrade all the equipment.

Driving mechanic where you steer where you look, making it impossible to drive straight while looking around or behind you.

"boost me up"?

Huge amounts of foreshadowing, but the story is already very predictable.

Motion controls.

Very long unskippable cutscenes before all bosses.

Hitboxes that make no sense whatsoever.

Voice Actors that really want to be somewhere else. (perhaps with full bladders?)

All cutscenes are slideshows.

A huge open world, with massive Travel distances and no fast travelling, and theres nothing to explore.

> escort mission with walk-and-talk exposition dump
> keep close to the escort target or the radio will yell at you
> faster than walking
> slower than running

A currency system where the game has a normal currency that you can earn via tasks but that currency is artificially nerfed because there is an additional “premium” currency that is only available either in extremely paltry amounts that have to be saved over months of grinding or spending actual cash. Also there’s a ton of stuff that can only be purchased with large amounts of premium currency

A subscription for basic services like multiplayer or a song catalog even though you just paid $70 for the game

High paced action game that suddenly grinds to a halt for a forced stealth section that was clearly tacked on and poorly designed

• Escort Section where the person you're escorting moves at a slower pace than you do, forcing you to jog, walk, jog all the time.

• Want to quit the game? Sure go into the menu, click Quit Session -> Are you sure? -> click Yes -> Loading Screen -> Game menu -> click Quit Game -> Are you sure? -> click Yes -> Loading Screen -> Unskippable game title intro -> sub menu with Quit Game, Continue Game, New Game -> click Quit Game -> Are you sure? -> click Yes -> Loading Screen -> Desktop

• Lonely? Don't worry, the main character is never going to shut up and will comment on every single thing with lines that won't get old at all.
• Yeah, you can play with your friend... After hours of gameplay, once you both have this super special item and only for certain, boring ass missions.
• You need an account, and we have no native sign up so we're going to open up a completely different window while you try to drag your mouse awkwardly with the controller. Yes, the cancel button is very close to the confirm, no there's no confirmation, and yes you'll have to start this shit from scratch.
• Escort missions, but the escort won't get out of the fucking way, and your shots can kill them.
• Currency systems that are just currencies within currencies, within currencies.
• The items are easy enough to see, but you have to be in just the right location to pick it up.
• There's a save screen, but nothing actually pauses.
• I know 99% of games use similar buttons for different functions, but what if we switch it up, just for giggles? Let's make "jump" the R1 button!
• You can drive, but it's on ice physics. And, yes, there will be a chase sequence that's going to take you a very, very long time.

Don't forget a save point right before the unskippable cutscene and overly difficult boss fight, so you get to watch it over again every time you die.