My friends. I have a wonderful small group who at this point know when I need to talk, or when I need a distraction, or when I just need to sit in quiet but still want company. I'm fairly confident that I wouldn't be here without them.
this post was submitted on 17 Jul 2023
152 points (97.5% liked)
Asklemmy
43956 readers
1189 users here now
A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions
If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!
- Open-ended question
- Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
- Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
- Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
- An actual topic of discussion
Looking for support?
Looking for a community?
- Lemmyverse: community search
- sub.rehab: maps old subreddits to fediverse options, marks official as such
- [email protected]: a community for finding communities
~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~
founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
Spouse or best friend, depending on the situation. (If my spouse is driving me up a wall, best friend it is!) Larger friend group of it's something less personal or that I want advice or help from multiple people for. It's taken me a long time, and a lot of personal healing and growth, to get to this point in my life where I have so many people I can rely on. It's really nice.
A few times I needed to leave home and get my mind cleared. Distance helped. I would go to my friends house for the night. I’m in Chicago Area and he was in Champaign.
He move to San Francisco so I went to my Grandmothers in Toronto for a week.
Other times I take the dog to do something.
That wasn’t sustainable so I started seeing a therapist if only just to vent and put an emotion on what I’m feeling. I have so much to vent that I make my therapist overwhelmed.
My mind gets burnt out from feeling that way and I start doing the bare minimum to put food in my belly. It usually goes uphill from there
Our minds work in mysterious ways, that’s for sure. I‘m thankful that I haven’t hit rock bottom for quite a while. It doesn’t hurt to know whom you can reach out to when you do though.
I have been that low a couple of times, and my current mentality has managed to get me out. It's astounding how close it is, somewhat like an unrefined version of self-help books which advise you to get up after getting to such a point.
Also the fact that I have no one to rely on might have made this a coping mechanism.
Cheers
I've never done it -- but if I did reach out while at a breaking point, the priority would probably be friend -> sibling -> parent. Let's hope neither of us reach that point anytime soon, OP!
I have people but i don't see the point in talking to others about problems that are in my head. If it gets bad I usually get drunk and complain into the internet void then wake up and delete my account and make a new username and start fresh. The older I get the less I'm pushed towards breaking point.
Thankfully, my answer isn't nobody.
I was completely alone until high school. I've got Asperger's so that didn't help things, but therapy and finally meeting sane people in high school got me to make friends. I'm ending college now and I'm still in touch with them. Got at least three people ready to listen to my rambling.
Now my biggest worry is losing them. I doubt I could rebuild that relationship with anyone else. We've been through everything.
That's not a thing right? Nobody wants to deal with your personal shit. Everyone has their own issues and don't need more. Just like everyone else, nobody. It's my shit to sort out.
We are social creatures and there's just so much you can handle on your own. I wonder what your point of view is about Friendship. What do you consider as a friend? What does make a friend? Genuinely curious.