The original post: /r/amitheasshole by /u/Successful_Item6464 on 2024-05-19 13:09:57.
Hello, I am searching for a little clarity on this situation from an outside perspective.
Currently, my husband, baby, and I live with my parents in their home. My parents are snowbirds, so they're only here about half the year. They are well off, and do not charge us rent, which allows me to stay home with the baby. In exchange, we look after the house and do the majority of housework, and just generally try to be helpful and agreeable roommates.
Last week was my birthday, and my parents were in town for it. A few days beforehand, my mom started hinting that she had gotten me something big. She seemed really excited.
The day came, and we had a small party at home. Ordered takeout from my favorite restaurant, and my husband had gotten me a couple nice things I'd been wanting. Finally my dad brought out a large box, and my mom was practically jumping up and down. I was getting excited to. Then I opened to wrapping to find... a KitchenAid stand mixer. The mixer and accessories, all together, cost about $500.
Here's the thing. I hate cooking. I know how to do the basics, and I do my fair share of cooking in the home, but I get no joy from it. My mom knows this. We've talked about it many times. But my mom loves to cook. And she loves to bake. In fact, she's been talking about wanting one of those mixers for years.
I guess she could see the disappointment on my face, because she started trying to convince me how amazing the mixer was. She went on about all the attachments and accessories, and how it's top of the line. I tried to feign interest. I smiled and thanked my parents for getting me something so nice. But my mom was now noticeably disappointed by my reaction.
We moved on to the cake, and after dinner I was focused on getting the baby ready for bed. The next day, the mixer was still in the box, and mom started giving me a hard time about it. She kept making comments about how you'd think I'd be more appreciative of a $500 gift. And that if someone had spent $500 on her birthday gift she would've pulled it out and started using it right away.
I went ahead and got it out and set it up just to appease her. But I still haven't used it. Honestly I don't even know what to do with it. I don't bake. I told my mom that she should feel free to give it a test drive, but she responded that it was mine, not hers.
Now she's saying that she and dad might go back to their beach house earlier than planned.
I'm just not sure what she expected. She clearly thinks I'm being an AH, but it's just so obvious that she bought that gift for her, not for me. I would've rather her spent way less on me, and gotten something I could actually use. But maybe I'm just acting like a spoiled brat. I grew up pretty privileged, so maybe my perspective is skewed.
So reddit, and I being an AH here?