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The original was posted on /r/bestofredditorupdates by /u/Direct-Caterpillar77 on 2023-12-29 06:02:44.
I am not The OOP, OOP is u/ismomcheating
Me [19M], my sister [21F] found a video of our mom [45F] she thinks its of her cheating, but I think it might not be. We can't agree what to do with it.
TRIGGER WARNING: accusations of infidelity, emotional abuse and manipulation, verbal abuse, invasion of privacy, sexual harassment
Original Post Apr 27, 2016
My sister found this video on my mom's laptop. I think she was using her laptop for some school stuff and she must have gone snooping through her personal files.
She found this video, its from a few years ago according to the date of the file. Its definitely our mom in the video, and it looks to be in some hotel room. There's definitely a man in the video, but he's holding the camera and we don't see his face or hear his voice. I don't want to go into any detail but its basically a striptease/sex tape filmed by the man, so while our mom is clearly identifiable, I can't tell exactly who the man is.
I first got angry at my sister for showing it to me, I told her this is gross, I don't want to see that. She told me she thinks it could mean our mom is cheating on our dad and we should at least present the information to our dad.
I told her its very likely its him in the photo (you can see the man's hands in a few shots), I think its my dad, she seems to think its not him.
I told her if we show it to them and it is him, not only will we be embarrassed, but they would be mad at her for snooping. She was like "why do you care? I'm the one who did the snooping, so only I'll get in trouble. I'll cover you if they try to get mad at you."
I told her there has to be a more sensitive way of approaching the situation, instead of just bombarding our parents with "hey we saw your sex tape which could either be with you or mom's secret lover", and we should consider the fallout. However she seems pretty adamant that she just wants to show them, she thinks its the safest option; since if she was cheating, she gets exposed, but if it was just dad, then no harm done.
We can't agree on what to do, and I have a feeling she might show it to them regardless of what I feel, but if I push hard enough I might convince her of an alternative solution. Any ideas on what we should do?
tl;dr: Sister found a sex tape involving our mom on the computer; guy's face is not visible. I think its dad, sister thinks its another man and she's cheating. She wants to confront them with the evidence, but I think we'd be in trouble if we do and we should find a more sensitive solution to what's going on (if anything is going on).
RELEVANT COMMENTS
OOP comes up with plans
Option A - Sending it anonymously
OOP
I like the idea of sending it to him anonymously, maybe through email or something. If its him, no harm done, and he doesn't know it was us.
MrsValentine
Please don't do that. Your parents will be shitting themselves wondering what kind of pervert hacker has gone through their computer to watch their private videos.
MelloxDrama
But if it is him, and you send it anonymously, he'll be freaking out about who has it and how they found it.
Option B - Telling dad about the video
If its him in it, he'll know its him, and won't he get mad at us for even looking at it? Is there a way I can let him know that I'm sorry I had to look at it but its only because we were concerned about him, so he doesn't get mad?
Option C - faking finding it in front of dad
OOP
Ok, what if we go up to him and tell him there's something we need to show him on the laptop, and then while browsing it in front of him we pretend to stumble on the thing for the first time. We can be like "what is this?" if he genuinely doesn't know and says open it to find out, it means he doesn't know about it. If he's like "no, don't click that!" It means he knows.
JackDuluozParadise
Dude, if you use one of the plans you've put in this thread or confront him with it please post an update. This is gold. I can't wait until your dad A)gets an anonymous email with his sex tape and thinks he's being blackmailed B)Finds out you have been watching him do the nasty with mom and is crazy embarrassed or C) (and my favorite option) you pretend to "mistakenly" find it while showing him something else and the whole family watches mom and dad's sex tape. Cheating women don't keep videos on the family laptop of them stripping and cheating they're not dudes. And if your mom turns out to be the dumbest cheater ever then all of this will expose itself soon enough (but she's not so it won't). But I just want to see the cringe update so I'm still rooting for C
OOP
No, here's what my sister and I decided to do: we're going to sit mom and dad down, tell them both (at the same time), that while we were using their laptop, we noticed there was a lot of junk and we were cleaning it up to make it run faster. In the process, we accidentally stumbled on this file, and mistakenly opened without knowing what it was, but closed as soon as we realised. We won't tell them we watched the whole thing and we won't tell them we suspect cheating. We'll say that the reason we're telling them this is because we think they should save the file in a more secure location, or maybe on a separate harddrive or something, so it doesn't get hacked into.
If my dad knows about the tape, he'll be like "okay that makes sense". If he doesn't know about the tape.... well, now he would.
Update May 5, 2016
Yeah, things didn't go so well unfortunately.
I kept arguing with my sister. I told her if she's so certain they're cheating, the least we could do is ask dad first if he knows about the tape but not mention that we've seen it. She was determined that it was cheating, based on the hands and the feet, she was like "those definitely aren't dads".
I told her she was creepy as fuck, if that was them in the video, and God knows how many times she's watched it, she was basically watching a video of our mother naked and fucking our dad's dick. Even if it wasn't our dad's dick, its still fucking gross. She didn't care. I told her if I couldn't stop her, she should at least leave me out of it, i want nothing to do with it.
She went nuclear, she went and told them everything, and embarrassed the fuck out of herself. Turned out her little detective work was way off, it was dad in the video.
Our dad was angry but mostly bewildered, but he just laughed it off and got over it.
Our mom however didn't take it so well. She had a panic attack, she went nuts. She was like "what the hell is wrong with you kids?" I tried to stay out of it but my sister dragged me into it and named me as her accomplice even though I had warned her against it. Our mom was so hurt and upset, not only that her daughter would so brazely accuse her of cheating, but that her children had watched an explicit sex tape of her. She was really traumatized, she couldn't take it any more.
She got up and left to her parents house where she's been there for a whole day to recuperate. She only called our dad to speak to, she won't speak to us. Our dad told us to just give it time until she's feeling better.
TLDR: nobody was cheating, but my sister fucked up my parents relationship. Mom is crying now and has gone to stay with her parents, won't talk to my sister or me.
THIS IS A REPOST SUB - I AM NOT THE OOP