this post was submitted on 08 Dec 2023
175 points (88.9% liked)

Asklemmy

43946 readers
580 users here now

A loosely moderated place to ask open-ended questions

Search asklemmy 🔍

If your post meets the following criteria, it's welcome here!

  1. Open-ended question
  2. Not offensive: at this point, we do not have the bandwidth to moderate overtly political discussions. Assume best intent and be excellent to each other.
  3. Not regarding using or support for Lemmy: context, see the list of support communities and tools for finding communities below
  4. Not ad nauseam inducing: please make sure it is a question that would be new to most members
  5. An actual topic of discussion

Looking for support?

Looking for a community?

~Icon~ ~by~ ~@Double_[email protected]~

founded 5 years ago
MODERATORS
 

Like, I travel around for work and I've met plenty of people from all backgrounds.

Why is there a demographic of people who don't seemingly bathe regularly, or at the very least wear something to cover up their BO? I could understand if it's an allergy, or even religious reasons (though the people I've met that smell bad are usually you're average American young adult man) but recently (like in the past week, recently) I've met a concerning number of people who don't seem to wear any kind of deodorant or possibly don't even bathe regularly; it's starting to become an issue for me, as I don't even want to interact with them when I can smell them walking up from 3+ feet away yet I need to for work.

Does anyone have any possible insight?

top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 201 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I look forward to reading what an online community that specializes in Linux and Star Trek memes has to say about personal hygiene...

[–] [email protected] 81 points 11 months ago (2 children)

I'm sorry, personal what? Is there a GitHub link where I can compile that?

[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Is this a joke I'm too C# to understand?

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 58 points 11 months ago

When you're so busy remembering to FOSS that you forget to floss 😢

[–] [email protected] 98 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (22 children)

People should shower regularly, but I find the aromas wafting from people who use many fragrance products far more offensive and offputting than someone smelling like a human. Some people's shampoo, laundry detergent and deodorant (not to mention body spray, cologne or perfume) are so strong that I can smell them from 5 feet away, and the odor lingers for several minutes after they leave an area. I don't really care what it smells like as much as that I seem to be allergic to these fragrances, and sneeze, get red eyes, my nose starts running my lips swell a bit. This is why some places have instituted a fragrance-free policy - as many as 25% of people have an allergy to various components of these perfumes. Unfortunately it's a very touchy thing to explain to people as the average person thinks they're doing something virtuous by wearing a bunch of fragrances and it makes them more appealing to be around.

[–] [email protected] 28 points 11 months ago (1 children)

People become nose blind to their perfumes and deoderants so they put on more and more over time to smell the same (from their perspective). My mom has the same issue but claims it's all in my head.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

My mom and dad's hair products are about the worst thing imaginable. After they take showers I can hardly go in the same room as them for 3-4 hours and the scent even lingers for 5-10 minutes after they walk out. She said 'huh? it has a scent?'

[–] [email protected] 19 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Every single day, when I am out walking my dog, a jogger comes by smelling of like a shit-ton of soap/perfume/deodorant/body spray - I nearly gag. These guys (and sometimes girls) are so terrified they might smell sweaty when doing something, you know, sweaty, like jogging a couple of miles...it boggles my mind.

Who taught people we have to smell like artificial bouquets of flowers all the time, even when exercising, ffs?

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (20 replies)
[–] [email protected] 82 points 11 months ago (7 children)
load more comments (7 replies)
[–] [email protected] 62 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I was this kid all throughout my school years.

Parents never taught me any kind of personal hygiene, and my house was filled with a thick smog of smoke, so my sense of smell is still shot to this day. To give an idea how bad it was, I was asking for dentures when I was 14 because my teeth were literally falling out. The water in our house was spotty at best, on top of the hygiene thing, so baths were maybe once every 2 weeks or so. My parents always had a fridge stocked with Coca Cola, but almost never drinkable water.

Besides pointing at my parents, I don't really have an explanation for you, but I've definitely "been there."

It took a lot of effort, but I've come a looooong way since then. Like... unrecognizably so, thankfully - other than the dentures, at least.

If anyone is reading this, and in a situation where their home life or depression or whathaveyou is putting you in this kind of situation: Just know that things can and will get better. I know how difficult and embarrassing it can be when you're deep in it, but all you gotta do is be a little bit better than yesterday (when you're able). It takes time, but it's totally worth it.

[–] [email protected] 19 points 11 months ago

Wow thank you for sharing. I grew up poor and grubby too, but my folks were health food nuts, so I think I got spared the worst of it compared to some people I've seen.

I'm so glad things have got better for you.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 11 months ago (13 children)

I don't think you're going to find anyone that admits to smelling bad. I assume people who smell bad do it because they don't know that they smell, so they don't try to change anything.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago

Yep, that's likely the problem with most people. It's nothing you usually talk about and people won't change problems they aren't aware off. We should probably normalize talking about it without anyone being offended.

load more comments (12 replies)
[–] [email protected] 32 points 11 months ago (2 children)

My girlfriend finds showering and bathing extremely painful due to several very severe skin conditions. She’s also allergic to almost every deodorant that doesn’t cost a ridiculous amount. She doesn’t sweat a whole lot so it’s usually not an issue, and can get away with only one shower a week usually. Her conditions are pretty rare so I’m not saying everyone who doesn’t shower regularly has what she has, but there might be factors at play for some that give them legitimate reason not to shower. Or it could just be laziness

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 23 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

The few people I know with this issue fall into one of two categories.

  1. Access issues. There are some kinds of road blocks accessing a quality shower/bath. Which makes showering/bathing is an uncomfortable activity for some reason. Maybe it's that their shower is really small and cramped, with a low quality shower head. Maybe it's an issue where the water quality is low in the shower they have access to. Low quality water can have an odor people find uncomfortable, or it can dry out their skin making their skin feel dry even while under the water. People naturally avoid things that make them uncomfortable even subconsciously.

  2. Mental Health. I suffer from this occasionally. I love showering, it's extremely relaxing, but for whatever reason the process of getting into the shower is such a huge barrier to overcome. You feel like absolute dog shit. You know that a shower would make you feel better, but for whoever reason no matter how hard you try, you cannot push through the transition of wanting to shower, to taking that first step towards doing it. And it all compounds together to make you feel like an even bigger piece of shit for not being able to do something so basic. Until eventually you've doom scrolled the entire day away and now it's dark out and you're tired and you've got a stress headache because you've barely even ate today either while you just stewed in your own filth.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 23 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Copying and pasting my answer from the same question just 2 weeks ago:

How do you know they all weren't wearing it?

There are a lot of people who do wear it but continue to smell because of underlying medical conditions. For example, fruity smelling body odor can indicate diabetes. People with a rare genetic condition called Trimethylaminuria can smell strongly of fish. It all depends on what bacteria (which outnumber your own body cells by 10 to 1 even though they are only 2% of your body mass) and what balance of enzymes you may or may not have.

Reducing perspiration can and often does help, concealing the odor with different ones can help, but sometimes people's bodies just aren't right for whatever mass produced product they have bought. Sometimes that can be fixed with medication. Sometimes it can't.

https://kbin.social/m/[email protected]/t/638513/-/comment/3647566

[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (6 children)

Another sucky condition is chronic hyperhidrosis, which causes excessive, sometimes permanent (my case), sweating. I bathe every day, sometimes multiple times a day, and reapply deodorant every 5 hours or so, but even then, if you catch me at an inopportune time, I may well be sweaty.

load more comments (6 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 23 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (4 children)

A lot of people simply don't know proper hygiene because they were never taught it.

A shower doesn't mean let the water run over you for a few minutes and then spray on some deodorant. Lather some soap in to a flannel and scrub every part of your body, and if you sweat badly use antiperspirant.

But it's recent thing you've noticed. People might be cutting back on things due to budget. Not many people would admit that they're not showering because of financial worries.

[–] [email protected] 36 points 11 months ago (4 children)

I was that person as a kid. I‘m autistic and my proprioception (feeling of body stuff) is all over the place. I didn’t know back then but I do now.

My parents didnt tell me and I had to learn by being bullied for it at school.

Since its not always easy, I have a different take on cleaning:

  • if you can, shower at least every two days
  • if you sweat a lot or work manually, shower daily
  • no need to scrub your whole body, just clean your arm pits, genitalia and butthole, more if a spot is dirty
  • wash your hair according to your skin. Hair should not be greasy but if that can be achieved by washing 2 times a week thats fine

If you‘re in a bad mood/are broke and cant shower use a piece of cloth and spot clean mentioned areas.

Use deodorant daily, if you sweat profusely like I do, use stronger/prescription deodorant.

I hope that helps.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I was brought up before showers were something that most people had installed, and we just washed at the sink with a flannel cloth. We washed face, pits, bum, and feet twice a day, and only had a bath once or twice a week. I still just do a wash of the important bits at the sink with a cloth if I'm feeling very apathetic.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (3 children)

Lather some soap in to a flannel and scrub every part of your body

That's not recommended by dermatologists. Soap destroys the acid layer on your skin that keeps bacteria out. As a regular thing, you should therefore only lather on soap where the bacteria buildup is high enough, i.e. under your arms, in your butt crack and other skin folds.

Unless you got super sweaty, you shouldn't soap up your arms and legs every day.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

I can't stand the feel of human-produced skin oils building up anywhere on my body. I need to feel squeaky clean to feel clean. But that might be just my own personal mental problems. I never even use lotion. I just can't stand grease and oily substances. Seeing or feeling my own fingerprints on my devices sends me into a rage of wiping everything down with alcohol.

load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 20 points 11 months ago (4 children)

Sometimes I’ll go a few days when I’m working from home and not going anywhere out of pure laziness. But if I’m going to be interacting with other people, shower guaranteed beforehand.

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 19 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

Believe it or not, most of us don’t actually need to shower every day. If you’re not doing a lot of physical work or don’t work in a place with a lot of grime, you can honestly get away with showering less often. Technically the same goes for deodorant but I wouldn’t go a day without it lol.

I personally shower once every day, but I don’t shampoo my hair nor use body wash all over my body every day. I’ll usually use conditioner only for my hair and I will regularly wash my pits, feet, privates, butt, and ears with body wash, but I only really use shampoo and use body wash everywhere like twice a week or so. I also apply deodorant every day. No comments about bad smells from everybody including a people who will straight-up comment on stuff like that, and I’ve actually got a lot of compliments about my hair :)

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago (4 children)

I do sort of agree, but also there's a lot of people who don't think they need to shower but really do. I know people who will argue that they only need to shower 2 or 3 times a week but they stink.

load more comments (4 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 19 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Wearing deodorant has nothing to do with bathing regularly.

You can bath regularly and not need deodorant, every body is different. Also depends on the activities done between each bath/shower.

Now some people do not bath regularly and use deodorant or perfume, that never ends up well in terms of odor.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago (5 children)

A deodorant does not replace washing your body. The combination of both smells is the most terrifying. I hate the smell of all deodorants, so don't use them. But I shower sufficiently, you won't smell me from a distance. Promised.

load more comments (5 replies)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (4 children)

My experiences with stink.

  • Old people. Some were raised to shower infrequently because regular bathing wasn’t a luxury they had access to growing up. They carry this habit with them now. Source: I used to work with lots of old people.

  • People from cold climates who move to warmer ones. Sure, in Amsterdam you can shower once a week but move to Australia and you stink. Source: My ex-father-in-law is Dutch, living in Australia.

  • People who avoid soaps and deodorants because they prefer natural alternatives or ‘splashing and rinsing’. They think they don’t stink. Most girls I’ve met with bad smelling vaginas fall into this category. Source: Dating.

  • Teenagers who haven’t worked out puberty yet. Source: Used to work in a school.

  • Re-wearing unwashed clothes too many times. Source: Figured this one myself.

  • People who prefer to stink. When you don’t bathe and don’t use deodorant, you get used to the icky feeling and the smell to the point where you prefer it, and a shower and soap then makes you uncomfortable (itchy/tingly). Source: Ex-girlfriend.

[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago

You missed one: depression

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 15 points 11 months ago (2 children)

The older I get, the more I sympathize with Agent Smith from the Matrix. What is it with people and their stink?

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Didn’t someone just ask this like, a week ago?

[–] [email protected] 19 points 11 months ago

We’re obviously not getting the hint!

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago

Next week's post:

Why do guys named Steve not shower regularly or wear deodorant?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

I'm a Reddit moderator with over 2 million karma I don't have time to bathe. When I do bathe it's useing a garden hose because I weigh 450 pounds

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago (4 children)

sorry, i shower twice a day and wear deodorant but i just sweat so damn much that i end up smelling within a few hours no matter what :(

load more comments (4 replies)
[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago

Depressed autistic

[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (2 children)

Regular bathing isn't what you want, frequent bathing, that's important. What good is it if someone bathes with great regularity on the first of every month?

[–] [email protected] 11 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

One of the common definitions of “regularly” is “frequently”. E.g. “We used to meet regularly, but less and less as time went on.” This is also why frequent customers are called “regulars”.

edit: "Happening or doing something often" is even the first definition of the Cambridge English dictionary. Misinterpreting OP's use of "regular" just feels like Stack Overflow level pedantry.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 11 months ago (7 children)

I shower and wear deodorant everyday, but around late afternoon the deodorant just gives out and I start to smell

[–] [email protected] 10 points 11 months ago

You need a different deodorant. I'm a pretty heavy sweater and changing to Certain DRI "prescription strength" was a game changer for me.

load more comments (6 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›