Transfem
A community for transfeminine people and experiences.
This is a supportive community for all transfeminine or questioning people. Anyone is welcome to participate in this community but disrupting the safety of this space for trans feminine people is unacceptable and will result in moderator action.
Debate surrounding transgender rights or acceptance will result in an immediate ban.
- Please follow the rules of the lemmy.blahaj.zone instance.
- Bigotry of any kind will not be tolerated.
- Gatekeeping will not be tolerated.
- Please be kind and respectful to all.
- Please tag NSFW topics.
- No NSFW image posts.
- Please provide content warnings where appropriate.
- Please do not repost bigoted content here.
This community is supportive of DIY HRT. Unsolicited medical advice or caution being given to people on DIY will result in moderator action.
Posters may express that they are looking for responses and support from groups with certain experiences (eg. trans people, trans people with supportive parents, trans parents.). Please respect those requests and be mindful that your experience may differ from others here.
To make such a request, at the start of the body of your post, not in the title, the first line should look like the this: [Requesting Engagement from _________]
Some helpful links:
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible // In depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria.
- Trans Voice Help // A community here on blahaj.zone for voice training.
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory // A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers.
- Trans Resistance Network // A US-based mutual aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination.
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project // Advice about insurance claims for gender affirming healthcare and procedures.
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library // A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document.
- Gender Spectrum // Resources for youth, parents and family, educators, mental health professionals and faith leaders.
Support Hotlines:
- The Trevor Project // Web chat, phone call, and text message LGBTQ+ support hotline.
- TransLifeLine // A US/Canada LGBTQ+ phone support hotline service. The US line has Spanish support.
- LGBT Youthline.ca // A Canadian LGBT hotline support service with phone call and web chat support. (4pm - 9:30pm EST)
- 988lifeline // A US only Crisis hotline with phone call, text and web chat support. Dedicated staff for LGBTQIA+ youth 24/7 on phone service, 3pm to 2am EST for text and web chat.
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It's hard. It's something I struggled with for a long time. It felt like I had finally got to the point where I could accept and celebrate my queer identity, only to effectively lose it a couple of years later.
I'm panromantic, but heterosexual, and for a long time, I used the labels straight and transhet, as a way of trying to push back against the whole "a guy dating a trans woman is gay" thing, but eventually, I let go of the label, because I just couldn't deal with the assumptions people made about my queerness. These days I just call myself queer.
Similarly, I felt invisible when I was out in public with my boyfriend. We both just looked like a regular cishet couple. I'd spent most of my life telling myself that's what I wanted, only to discover it really isn't what I wanted, because it erased another part of me that was important. It felt like stepping out of one closet and in to another.
Unfortunately, I don't know what the answer is. At the moment, I'm in a poly relationship with another woman and an enby, so my queerness is right there on display, but when I was in mono relationships with men, it was hard to lose it.
That's exactly how I feel! I think it's compounded by living in a rural area. I want to fit in not only because that's my childhood dream but also for a sense of safety. I'm not sure what the answer is either. Maybe this is just a stage of transitioning or maybe it's possible to form strong bonds with allies, eventually, the way it seemed to feel easier with queer people before. I just know that I feel lonely at the moment and the queer community as a whole has seemed more distant to me.