DEAR MISS MANNERS: Lately at social events, I often find myself trapped by people who want to share, in excruciating detail, their genetic test results.
Each person finds their own results deeply compelling, marveling at length over being 3% this and 15% that, with stunning reveals like, “I thought I we were Welsh, but it turns out we’re Scottish!”
Meanwhile, the next person is on deck, barely half-listening, eagerly getting ready to launch into their own genetic saga.
Monologuing about the minutiae of one’s DNA is self-absorption at, quite literally, the cellular level. Is there a polite way to shut this down?
GENTLE READER: Oh, dear. Miss Manners would have thought that we had established the idea that bragging about one’s lineage is rude, and now it has started up again.
Well, you could try expanding the scope of the conversation. Try, “What would your ancestors have thought of the state of America today?” Or, “I suppose you must want to travel there now. What are your vacation plans this year?”
Or, “Excuse me, I need to freshen my drink.”
they tested my cum and it came back Probably Nordic, just like Opa always said!!
The people getting DNA tests all imagine their ancestors as kings and slaveowners. This would just replace a conversation about genetics with racism.
It's like the mirror image of the "temporarily embarrassed millionaire" thing. Every american is the forgotten direct scion of european nobility and not all of the workers and peasants they're descended from.
I think this is not just americas but that it's present in gene-obsessed people all over europe. Anyone that gives a fuck about dna bullshit seems to be obsessed with being part of some ruling master race.
Europeans would be the last people I would assume would want to do these kinds of tests. You’d figure country of origin would be good enough.