this post was submitted on 04 Sep 2023
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My 13 hour flight just got delayed 7 hours, I'm stuck at my second airport, and I dont think I'm gonna make it. I have some movies and audio books on my phone, but really only anticipated having to burn the flight time via napping and some media, not 7 hours leading up to it, and I'm pretty sure I'm gonna mentally burn out on passive media.

  • I have media on my phone - movies, shows and audio books, but I can only do about 2-3 hours at a stretch before I burn out on those things.
  • I have wifi and power both on the ground and on the plane, although I'm sure the connection once we get going isn't going to be performance enough for online games.
  • I have a phone and headset but didn't bring a laptop because it was just extra bulk I didn't think I'd need. I don't have a switch or steam deck or anything neat.
  • I have access to the airport lounge, so drinks are free, and I get free drinks on the plane. I don't want to get wasted or have to pee constantly, so my plan is to jim lahey it.
  • I'm intrigued by mobile games, but every one I've tried has felt too gimmicky with gambling or freemium BS mechanics. Also tried started valley but it never got me hooked either. I have an android and will buy games if they're worth it.
  • I'm open to any other ideas that could somehow mentally (or physically while on the ground) stimulate me.
  • I'm a dude in my 30s with a family and kids, but I'm currently traveling solo.
  • I've already killed 2 hours on a plane and 2 more on the ground (my planned connection time) doing nothing, I was saving my media trying to avoid burning out on shit before I get on the plane.
  • I suck at sleeping when on the go.
  • I'm on my 3rd mimosa and bored as fuck.

Help.

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[–] [email protected] 131 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Not trying to be a contrarian (it just happens!) but boredom will not kill you. In fact, I challenge you to sit and be bored for a good few minutes. It's good for you. I'm terrible at it myself, but that's what being a dopamine crack addict will do, I guess.

If you're out of ideas for things to do, try mindfulness meditation (Waking Up is an app with a bunch of free lessons to get you started) - very little woowoo, just pay cursory attention to something, then when your mind inevitably wanders off, just "notice" and be, well, mindful. It's like an antidote for boredom, in a weird way, and studies have shown that for whatever reason, it's good for you.

Myself, I read books for any "random short term downtime".

[–] [email protected] 45 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Can confirm. The longest train I ever rode was a 44h long train. The first 12-24 hours push on your nerves: you've listened to music, read a book, eaten, slept, and haven't much left to do. But slowly you come to understanding:"you don't HAVE to do something". This is when the therapy starts.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago

And it really does seem therapeutical. I scoffed a bit the first time I read about dopamine detoxes and stuff, but I've also, since then, caught myself being very nearly literally afraid of getting bored. That is insane.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

Sleeper cars on Amtrak were my saving grace when I was regularly traveling between Chicago and upstate NY.

It’s not nearly as long of a trip, and Chicago is a decent station to hang out in, buy being horizontal, getting actual sleep, and having a bathroom not shared by 4.100 other folks made it bearable and feel pretty quick.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (6 children)

I tried this mindfulness thing a few times, and just can't seem to get the hang of it.

Does the voice in your head distract you?

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 year ago (1 children)

That's part of the point, you aren't necessarily supposed to have an empty mind the whole time. I mean, if you can do that, great, but you aren't failing if that's not the case.

Imagine that your thoughts are buses, and your job is to sit at the bus stop and not get on any of them. Just notice them and let them go by. Like a bus stop, you don't really control what comes by, but you do control which ones you get on board and follow. If you notice that you've gotten on a bus, that's fine, just get off of it and go back to watching. Interesting things can happen if you just watch and notice which thoughts go by, and it's good practice for noticing what you're thinking and where you're going and taking control of it yourself when it's somewhere you don't want to go.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Beautifully explained. You remind me of the first lessons when I learned meditation.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 year ago (5 children)

Same. I can't sleep at night because my brain won't stfu.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 year ago

Well, meditation can help you to get better at telling your brain to shut up. Imagine it like training a muscle: in the beginning you won't be able to lift anything, but as you train it, it gets easier and easier to lift heavy weights.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

That is the "monkey mind" that meditating can help calm.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 year ago

Don't worry about it. You will get distracted, and it's fine. In mindfulness the clue is to just "notice" whatever the intrusive thought (or whatever) is, then resume whatever you were doing. I found it helpful to do the "breath focus" thing and counting them - lost count all the time because that isn't really the point, it's just something to do while essentially waiting for your brain to do something. Noticing is the point, both whatever you're doing and what your brain does when it veers off.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

Try audio books for sleeping. TV didn't work at all but audio books work great. And I really enjoy then as well. Typically just set a timer so they shut down and if I wake and can't turn off the brain, just start listening again.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 year ago

I always said that too but I really just wanted to continue being stimulated.

What has helped me is to realize that my brain keeps working at night when.

Recently I was working on a project with my son involving some engineering and construction and I came up with an idea at like 9:00 pm and thought about it until 11:30 pm while I tinkered with it but I could not make it work right. The next morning it was like my hands knew exactly what to do and I built it immediately and it worked the first try.

Try acting like your brain's boss or its commanding officer. Tell it what to do. If you're having trouble shutting down your brain when it's coming up in bed time, give it a direct order: "okay conscious brain, it is time for you to stop what you are doing and go to sleep now. Unconscious brain is going to take over on this problem while you are resting."

For real, your brain needs to sleep. It uses night time to assimilate the days memories so you can recall them later, and it uses that time to process and understand concepts and make predictions.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

Having thoughts isn’t an issue. The issue is engaging with the thought.

You’re sitting there meditating. Then your head goes “hey, I gotta pay my insurance bill”

And then you go, “oh yeah, the insurance bill. For my car. Do I need to change the oil yet? Oh no, I have another like 800 miles to go. What’s 800 miles from here? Cleveland? Man, that LeBron really has some longevity”

Or instead, you could go “I’m meditating”. No judgment though, just point it out. Just note that a thought occurred and redirect your attention to the fact that you’re meditating and to your breath or whatever else. Another thought will come up shortly thereafter. You can just redirect again.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Yes, all the time. It's a crucial part of the whole thing, as far as I know. (Not an expert, barely do it, have been meaning to get back into some kind of habit)

Before this, I thought of meditation as the whole "still mind" thing, but if it's how anyone works, it sure isn't me. Mindfulness is more about realizing when a new thought "arises", looking at it sort of dispassionately, and gently refocusing yourself. There's no real "failure state", you will get distracted and that is fine, just get back into it.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 year ago

Thats voice is the whole thing.

Meditation is the act of quieting that voice.

The more you practice it, the easier it becomes.

There's a lot of ways to meditate (a lot of ways to quiet the voice). Have to practice them.

The advantage is that the next time you are being distracted by those thoughts at a time when distraction is unhelpful, you will more naturally and easily quiet your mind and resume your focus.

It's like practicing to control your thoughts. Think of it like walking the dog. It's going to pull at first. Gotta keep walking.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 year ago

What helped me was continuing to notice each thought from my inner voice and continuing to letting them go

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 year ago

I write it down if my voice tells me something I should remember, else i just let my thoughts wander wherever they want.

After a while I know what I want to do next, because boredom showed me what my body and mind needs.