this post was submitted on 21 Oct 2024
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Food Crimes - Offenses against nutrition

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Welcome to Food Crimes! This community is here to collect all and any post about cursed food and generally unusual consumables.

Right now, here’s the rules:

  1. Posts must include an image or video containing food or drink.
  2. It must be unusual or cursed in some way. a. For example, something like Doritos Milk would be unusual, but normal milk would not.
  3. No AI posts whatsoever, and any images that were altered (Ex: Photoshop, Gimp) need to be tagged.

How to tag: To tag your posts, please prepend or append the tag name inside square brackets. For example,[OC] Foo bar baz or foo bar baz [Meta] would be acceptable. Multiple tags will require separate pairs of brackets, like so: [Edited][OC] foo bar baz

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(BTW, I’m looking for someone to help mod here! I myself would not be enough if this community goes beyond a few posts a day.)

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[–] [email protected] 70 points 1 month ago (5 children)

I love how fast and loose this plays with the definition of "salad".

[–] [email protected] 35 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Right? Cover a fucking donut with mayonnaise, serve it on a single leaf of lettuce - boom, salad.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago

You watch, Dunkin' Donuts will feature this next month as "healthy".

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Can't wait to see a black forest gateau salad.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago (2 children)

In the 70s salad was any sort of combination of plant material and sauce

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Yes! Throw some crap in jello, serve on a lettuce leaf, SALAD!

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Ah no. A salad was anything combined with anything else but not cooked (again). This led to some true abominations at the table. Too often, mayonnaise (and not even mayonnaise but Miracle Whip) served as the binder.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago (2 children)

My wife's grandma makes "pretzel salad", which is crushed pretzel sticks that are tossed with a mixture of margarine and cream cheese, I think, then baked until crispy then crumbled.

In the meantime, cream cheese, maybe whipped cream?, sugar, a few other onesies and twosies, and canned shredded pineapple are mixed into an unholy slop.

Then, when is time to serve, the crumbles are mixed in with the slop and there you go. Salad.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Is this a side for a meal, or a dessert?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago

I believe it's a dessert

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Mmm, interesting. Pretzel salad for me is the layer of crushed pretzel and melted butter (no cream cheese here) baked, like you said, then a layer of a cream cheese frosting, then a layer of strawberries in strawberry jello. All separate layers, no unholy slop, and it's sooooo good. But no, it's not salad.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

It used to mean any meal served cold. Later versions were encased in gelatin for better preservation, which contributed to the later post-war jelly salad recipes.